Neeru - Week #4 Eureka

Hi everyone, its Eureka time again. I’ve been on such an honest streak so why not continue. This week’s reading dealt with opposite sex friendship and although I responded on the DB I kept that on target with the text book. I’m using this blog to put my real life experiences out for everyone to read. So here goes...I am not going to criticize everyone that has had or held an opposite sex friendship but for me personally it does not work. I had a couple of close opposite sex friendships that all ended in the same manner…either I wound up liking them or they wound up liking me. It just wound up being a bad situation. My last male friendship was with a male at my work. We had a lot in common and enjoyed joking around during the day. He was someone that I was not attracted to in a sexual manner. We were friends for about a year when he started having marital problems and began venting to me about his wife. Being a woman naturally I was a good listener and consoler. He eventually expressed his love for me and I was dumbfounded. I had no idea what to say or do. I transferred departments shortly after to move away from him. I still talk to him but in a very limited fashion. Since then I have not thought about having a male friendship with anyone. I will give anyone a chance because I’m too afraid. For so many years I felt so bad and guilty and was relieved to find out from our text that the feelings were only natural due to gender norms. Since my encounter I no longer pursue or encourage opposite sex friendships because I just don’t see it as a possibility. Everything seems to start out ok but the more you share the closer you get and then you become vulnerable.